May 15 2013
Dan and I discuss all things Knicks-Pacers, including Woodson’s bad coaching, Kidd’s bad playing, and WHERE THE HELL IS PRIGIONI!?!
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May 13 2013
Tyson is awesome, but was he deserving of such a high accolade?
Earlier today, Knicks center Tyson Chandler was named NBA first team All-Defense. Chandler is one of the best defenders in the league, as well as one of the game’s top centers. However, his injury riddled season combined with an iffy Knicks defensive scheme resulted in Chandler being much less effective this season than in his 2011 Defensive Player of the Year campaign. When he won that award last season, he was voted second team All-Defense. This years winner, Memphis’ Marc Gasol, finds himself in the same circumstance. The simple and likely explanation for this is that the coaches are always a year behind in these awards/accolades. Next year, Gasol will replace Chandler on the first team All-Defense.
May 10 2013
Where’s the playoff pipe?
Quasi-elbowing that was considered a real elbowing, a proclaimed funeral that was actually a near-death experience, clubbing excessively (not seals), Twitter ranting, and the like; J.R Smith has never been the same on the court. The inefficient Sixth Man of The Year in the playoffs as of recent has been worrisome. It’s at a point where people prefer him to be on the bench rather than on the court, so people’s eyes could be saved from the hydrochloric acid being poured into their eyes that is the ghastly shooting percentages posted ever since he came back from his quasi-Bill Cartwright elbow incident on Jason Terry. Of course, it’s J.R in a nutshell; his cool shooting performances resulted in a playoff homecoming of “Bad J.R,” and playoffs “Good J.R” is still nowhere to be found. Let’s take a look at his recent shooting percentages: More
May 6 2013
Melo needs to play better
Seven games into the 2013 playoffs, the newly crowned NBA scoring champion is struggling mightily and his team has followed suit. Carmelo Anthony has yet to find his offensive stroke, recording a woeful 47.6 true shooting percentage. In large part due to the struggles of their cornerstone offensive weapon, the high powered Knicks offense of the regular season has found itself performing at the worst level of the remaining playoff teams. In fact, it’s not even close. The Knicks are scoring just 97.3 points per 100 possessions. Indiana comes in as the second worst offense. They’re scoring 101.5 points per 100 possessions, which is sizably better than their 2nd round counterpart.
Anthony hasn’t been the only Knick to struggle. Tyson Chandler hasn’t been fully healthy, hampering his mobility and ability to set good screens – a crucial part of the offense. JR Smith’s shooting has been marred in a playoff fog and Jason Kidd has fallen off the face of the Earth. Coach Woodson also deserves blame. His offensive play calling has been atrocious and his adjustments non-existent. By far the best offense has been the spread pick and roll, as it was during the regular season, but Woodson has opted for a seemingly endless amount of Anthony wing-isolations instead. The results have not been good. But that brings us back to Anthony. More
May 5 2013
A satirical take on JR Smith’s Saturday night
After coming off an emotional roller-coaster of sorts in Boston a couple of nights ago, J.R Smith needed to combat his offensive ineptness. On Saturday night, according to Smith’s publicist, he was “smoking a blunt heavier than a full bag of Halloween candy collected in a pillow case from trick-or-treating,” and “looked atop his head and noticed an imaginary light bulb flickering on and off,” while sitting in his Maserati Coupe. “The weed he had smoked in the car that night really made him paranoid,” said Smith’s publicist, who didn’t want to be identified. “All of a sudden, I was at a loss for words; he was singing ‘Say You, Say Me’ by Lionel Richie while high. And I must say, what a (expletive) night.”
But that wasn’t J.R’s only method of calming himself down. The Knicks, on their team bus, headed to Indiana to face the Pacers. Once they got to the hotel they were staying at—with every member of the team asleep besides him— J.R ran out of his hotel room and stole the team bus to go on a joyride, en route to the nearest local nightclub in town. More
May 4 2013
I’ve got the Knicks winning in 7. I don’t feel good about it though.
New York almost blew a 26 point fourth quarter lead Friday night in game 6 and in the process I almost wet my pants. Nonetheless it’s onto the second round, where the second seeded Knicks will face off with the third seeded Indiana Pacers. Like Boston, Indiana is a great defensive team. The Pacers finished the regular season as the league’s best defense, allowing just 96.6 points per 100 possessions. Though they got by the Celtics in round 1, the Knicks offense really struggled, scoring just 96.9 points per 100 possessions.
This series is going to be an absolute bloodbath. Like the Celtics series, we’re again going to see a contrast of regular season styles. Indiana boasts a great defense and a mediocre offense, while the Knicks boast a great offense and subpar defense. These are two evenly matched teams and there are some really interesting story lines and match-ups to look at. I’m going to break it all down. More
May 1 2013
Yeah, so about that funeral…
The Celtics don’t want to die. They really don’t. So much for that Knicks funeral that was supposed to happen; it was one, colossal near-death experience for the Celtics. The Knicks totally wasted their time for dressing up in black suits. Celtic fans are going to be hitting us Knick fans back with some kind of black suit/funeral joke variant. But those jokes are all irrelevant for the time being. It’s funny that Celtic fans think that the Knicks are oscillating the white flag in the air already. While this is an infuriating loss, that is obviously not the case.
The Knicks scored the first 11 points of the game. It may have taken light years for the Celtics to strike back, considering their crappy offense. The Celtics scored their first basket on a Brandon Bass free throw with 7:32 remaining in the first quarter. Despite the big hole the Knicks dug the Celtics in, they got outscored 45-28 in the first half after the run. Jeff Green and Jason Terry were hitting threes down the stretch, Kevin Garnett went grizzled, clutch veteran in the 4th quarter and on the glass, and the good ole Celtics trash talk made the Knicks lose their composure and dopamine in their cerebral cortexs. More
Apr 28 2013
“Those damn Celtics”
Oh well. I couldn’t whip out my limited edition autographed Wicked Witch of The West broom to celebrate a Knicks sweep on the arch rival Celtics. Everyone that watched this game had their beats per minute go through the roof in the last two minutes of the fourth quarter and in overtime. Even if you took a whole bottle of Lipitor (I advise you not to do that), it still couldn’t have controlled the high blood pressure. The Knicks offense played like the Celtics offense from the last three games in the first half; one colossal hot, steamy turd was dropped on them from the rafters. Somehow, they were only down by 5 at the end of the first quarter. The game was very 90s-esque; sloppy, sluggish basketball was played and it was really documented in the first half, as the Knicks shot 29% from the field, along with an abysmal 20% from downtown, as well as committing 12 turnovers, more than their average 11.8 a game from this season. The Knicks didn’t gain the lead until Raymond Felton hit a jumper with 1:17 left in the fourth quarter, which explained the struggle within the Knicks: Gaining the lead. The reoccurring comeback gene that happened several times in the regular season was happening in the playoffs. The Knicks had a chance to capitalize in the final minute of the fourth quarter after Tyson tipped out™ an offensive rebound, which resulted in a Melo pull up three, in what was their final possession before Paul Pierce took the final shot that everyone thought was going to be drained because its Paul freakin’ Pierce, and missed, en route to overtime. More
Apr 22 2013
Ryan Lochte did some stuff on TV yesterday and you might have tragically missed it. Here’s the recap!
We’ve decided to give the Knicks a break here at the Meloship and provide some essential writing on the wonderful national treasure that is Ryan Lochte. So begins a weekly thing, for better or worse, where I will write recaps of episodes of “What Would Ryan Lochte Do?” in an attempt to make Mondays a little less terrible. Or more terrible. We’ll see. Jeah, this should be interesting.
We begin the inaugural episode of What Would Ryan Lochte Do? (WWRLD) with our hero and a large group of people called the “Lochterage” (Spectacular wordplay. We’re already off to a great start.) walking down the streets of Gainesville, Florida getting ready to play quite possibly the most intense game of flag football ever. Quickly, we are introduced to Lochte’s assistant/BFF Gene and his younger brother Devon. Devon, of course, is rocking a tuxedo shirt. Ryan, not to be out-bro’d, is wearing a tank-top that says “LochteNation” on it and keeps saying that over and over again to describe the group. The teams split into a shirts-vs-skins game, and shockingly, the real-life Aquaman quickly takes off his shirt. Some things to know about the game: More
Apr 22 2013
Hey! JR Smith won Sixth Man of the Year!
I have no issues with JR winning this award as I would’ve voted for him if I had a ballot. My mock ballot looked like this:
1. JR Smith
2. Ryan Anderson
3. Matt Barnes
4. Jarrett Jack
5. Jamal Crawford.
Winning 6MOY has become an award about wing scorers, and JR certainly would fit into that category, but that isn’t why I think he’s deserving of winning. If you looked at the majority of this season, he was largely inefficient shooting the ball (remember the ridiculous JR for all-star campaign?). Over the last month and a half, he’s been fantastic, but the season isn’t comprised of just it’s last month and a half. If this was an award about efficient scoring, Ryan Anderson is my runaway winner. But it’s not. More